Happy Thanksgiving



Happy Thanksgiving. A day to be thankful. A day to count your blessings. A day to stuff your face and hide until the pie because your family is legitimately crazy… Wait, that just might be mine.

I’ve never been a huge fan of Thanksgiving. Probably because I’m not a very “thankful” or “thoughtful” or “positive” person. Also I always feel fat for the rest of the day and that is an undesirable feeling. 

Now, don’t misunderstand me. I love my family. But “love” does not always equal “like.”

I’ve harbored a legitimate concern for my extended family’s mental health for several years now. I remember the first time it hit me. It was my sophomore year in college and I had to spend Thanksgiving break with my “foster grandparents” (it is another long story about who these people really are – I promise to tell it another day) because I couldn’t come home and they lived close to my college. Thanksgiving with them was so odd to me. It was quiet. We ate slowly. It wasn’t rushed, there was no yelling, no making fun of other people, no constant questions about who I was dating, no falling over, no farting, no burping – nothing of the sort. It was simple, quiet, pleasant, with normal guests. It hit me during dessert, that this is what “normal” must look like. I honestly felt like a stranger looking into the window of some make believe world. 

My family spends most, if not all, major holidays with my Dad’s side of the family. Both my Mom and Dad’s families have their quirks, their stories, their traditions – it’s just that I get more of my Dad’s side on a monthly basis. 

My extended family is just interesting… Not crazy… Yet. Though I do have a running bet with myself about who will snap first (it’s gonna be Me or one of my Uncles, I just know it).

Traditions at family gatherings include: 

   – someone always leaving early because they are sick/mad/sad/hurt/angry/bored

   – someone (usually Uncle ‘D’) making an inappropriate joke during dinner and no one laughing

   – someone (my sister the vegetarian) informing people of the fat and caloric content of all the meat

   – someone (my sister the vegetarian who is also in vet school) making me try to identify/guess the different bones of whatever meat we are eating 

   – someone taking a joke too far and actually hurting another family members feelings

   – someone asking all of us cousins (all girls) who we are dating/why we are still single/don’t we want to get married/don’t we want to give them great-grandchildren

   – someone spilling something on the table

   – someone (Grandma) spilling something on themselves

   – all of us cousins will be on our phones/iTouches constantly

   – 1/2 of the family falling asleep in different places

   – there will be a meltdown (usually a cousin, or 2nd cousin, sometimes a Mom/Aunt/Grandma)

   – someone will say something racist

   – someone will complain about how skinny/fat another relative is

   – someone will get way too into a game of Yahtzee/FanTan/Skip-Bo

   – my cousins will try to make me play Apples to Apples which is never fun with just 4 people

   – we will all be sarcastic

   – we will all make fun of each other at least once during the meal

   – there will be at least one dish that almost no one touches, and whoever made it will get mad

   – there will be some sort of accident/injury that will occur within the 24 hours of the holiday 

   – someone complaining about having to do this for every holiday

And these are just a few of the lovely things we do within the first 2 hours.

Family togetherness… 


Tangled: Stranger Danger

I love the movie Tangled. It’s all sorts of adorable and cute and the songs are so catchy that it drives you nuts with happiness (or maybe just nuts…)!


I’ve used frying pans in several self defense situations since I watched this movie.

Tangled is an adorably endearing take on the fairytale ‘Rapunzel’ – it has the secret princess with the long hair, the dashing handsome savior, the mean witch/crazy old lady, a chameleon… Actually I’m pretty sure the chameleon wasn’t in the Grimm Brothers’ version… 

Tangled has some lovely lessons about friendship, loyalty, trust, love, etc… But do you know what Tangled doesn’t address?



For reals though. There is NO lesson in this movie about not trusting strangers. In fact the movie indefinitely promotes talking to strangers, inviting them into your home, chatting them up in a bar…

When I was a child I was terrified of strangers. Like absolutely terrified. The first time I met distant cousins I didn’t speak to them for over a year. My mother put the fear of strangers in me (she also put the fear of God, knives, drugs, bad grades, disappointing her, and failure in me). I wouldn’t even look at people I didn’t know. Thankfully I grew out of this… during my freshman year of college (didn’t make a lot of friends that year).

Now I know Rapunzel is the most sheltered human being on earth during this movie, but her ‘Mother’ warns her CONSTANTLY of strangers and how dangerous they are and how they want to kill her. But she just lets one take her away to see some lights? Has she no sense of fear? No sense of self preservation?


I know he’s handsome… But the creepy ones always are! He could have sold her as a sexual slave to South America!

Now if I was Rapunzel, I’d want to high-tail it out of that tower ASAP. I know Rap (yeah, I shortened her name, what are you going to do about it?) loves her ‘Mother’ but even she had to realize that Mother Gothel was cray cray. Like major cray cray. There were many signs… So maybe Rapunzel thought that her ‘Mom’s’ view on strangers was wrong? 


This would be one of those signs we talked about. Kids, if you ‘mom’ cuddles your hair, you can take it as a sign that she is crazy.

So Rap runs off with the charming stranger to go see some lights. They stop at the local pub. Where she just starts chatting people up? I’ve been to a bar before… I didn’t talk to any strangers. Drunk people tend to make rash decisions. I didn’t want to be involved in any of those decisions. Not only does Rap talk to them, she sings with them. Then trusts them to help save her. She just met these guys? One of them has a hook? Since when did we all just start trusting people with hooks for hands???



Seriously kids, don’t go into bars. Don’t talk to strangers in bars. And certainly don’t take an escape route suggested by a large bald man with a villain mustache and a hook for a hand. 


Especially if they have a hook for a hand. Seriously.

So in the end Rap falls in love with the handsome stranger- of course. And after saving his life and him saving her life they get married. Kids, this does not happen in real life. It just doesn’t. We’ve all tried to come to grips with it and accept it. You will most likely not meet a gorgeous stranger and within 24 hours, fall hopelessly in love with each other, and have your parents approve of a sudden wedding.


Not real life. Never real life.

So folks, in conclusions. Don’t trust strangers because we don’t live in a Disney movie where everything works out perfectly. We have normal lives which are all imperfect and slightly messed up.

And some strangers can kill you and you don’t want to end up as an inspiration to a ‘Criminal Minds’ episode.


Top 10 Best Soundtracks

According to my opinion of course…

I love a good soundtrack. Whether it’s a musical score or a bunch of cool indie songs. I have some favorites that I must share with you. And you must listen to them… Or I will hunt you down. 

These are in no particular order because I couldn’t be bothered to decide which ones I like better.


You want to listen to pretty piano and string music that makes you find that happy place in your mind? This is it.



Singing in the Rain is just a great song in reality – the rest of the album is fabulous as well. You’ll never think of Moses and roses the same again…


You’ll feel pretty listening to this soundtrack… Or you’ll want to join a street gang, hold a knife, and dance a lot.



Modern, Edgy, Sleek – am I talking about a car or this soundtrack? This was one of my favorite albums to listen to this summer.


This soundtrack is very indie. If you’re into new music with an awesome vibe you’ll love this album.



I may have this entire album memorized… Word for word…
The songs, the music, it’s all adorable and bouncy and WILL GET STUCK IN YOUR HEAD FOREVER!


My all time favorite movie, so of course I love the score. Gorgeous orchestra numbers! Whenever I have a bad day I put this album on and fall asleep with good dreams.



The score for this movie is phenomenal! Very piratey (is that even a word??) and great to run or exercise to.


This movie has some popular 80s and 90s songs on it along with some indie tracks. It all combos well together for a very feel good album.



All of the Harry Potter scores. Just all of them. If you haven’t listened to them then you are an uncultured swine and I just don’t know what to do with you.

Do your ears, your brain, your soul, and your heart (maybe? I don’t know if you have a heart condition…) a favor and have a listen to them. It will change your life. Or it will at least give you something new to listen to besides Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus… 

The Parting Glass by University of Dublin, Ireland

I’m part Irish and very proud of the fact (most Irish are, not sure why, but we are all very proud to be Irish).
I’ve recently been going back into our family tree to see what parts of Ireland my Dad’s side of the family came from. And whilst I do my search I’ve been listening to some awesome Irish traditional songs.
This is probably my favorite so far.
The song is called the Parting Glass and it is sung by the chorale group at the University of Dublin in Ireland.
The video links back to their YouTube page. It’s just beautiful.
Do you ears a favor and listen!

Something Great For Me

I am feeling discouraged.

I feel like there is something great out there for me and I’m missing out. I don’t know how to get to it, where it is, or what it is. But I want it. I need it to happen to me.

Well, don’t I sound selfish… I’m not saying I think society/the universe/God owes me anything. They don’t. I know that I am among the most undeserving people on this planet scrounging around for a blessing or something great.

But it would be really nice if it happened to me.

I’m 24. I’m single. I was salutatorian in high school. I graduated with a 4 year degree from an academically challenging college with an above average GPA. I am a hard worker. I am nice. I am funny. I am loyal. I am dramatic. I love helping people. I am willing to work, to move, to learn new things, to be out of my comfort zone.

So why am I alone. With a semi-ok part time job. Living with my parents. With no social life to speak of. In the middle of no where.

Why have none of the Library Directors, from the 20+ jobs I applied to in NYC, responded to me? Why can’t I move out? Why do most of my friends ignore me on a daily basis? Why has one of my best friends in the whole world started treating me like trash? Why is it that when your college friends get married they forget you exist? Why does my mother put so much freakin pressure on me about not being married? Why do I have such a fragile relationship with my parents? Why do my sister and I only get along when we are not in the same city?

Why am I unhappy?

Why do I feel like there is more out there for me, right at my fingertips, and I keep missing it?


I know so many people have it worse. I know these are construed as ‘first world problems’ or ‘whining’ or ‘being selfish’ – but may I remind you, I’m just listing the questions I have right now. You have no idea about anything in my life. You don’t know how I was raised, my childhood, or any of the awful things I’ve experienced. So you can stop judging me now.

I almost feel like I’m disappointed in myself. Like I could have done so much better. I look back and I see the mistakes I’ve made. And I know I wish I could go back and change all of them but that ends up making me feel more discouraged. Because I can’t fix them. They happened. It’s done. I have to deal with what my life is now.


I knew who I wanted to be, what I wanted to do, where I wanted to go.

But I’m not that person. I didn’t end up doing what I wanted. And I am definitely not where I wanted to be.

I feel like my future is right at my fingertips. I just have to make a decision and go with it. But I am so terrified that I may make the wrong choice. I have a terrible track record for choices. I usually make ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE CHOICES. I never listen to advice from my friends and family. And even though I usually plan things out and do pros and cons and what not – I still end up making a spur of the moment decision. I can’t even trust myself to do the right/smart thing anymore. I’ve screwed up too many times.

But my future is right there. Staring me in the face. I can feel it. I just can’t see it. And people put so much pressure on your future. Like it’s the Holy Promised Land that we are all striving to visit before we die.


But what if we are already in our future? What if this is it? What you are doing right now, where you are, who you are. This is it. This is your future. What if it’s already started? What if you missed out on that Holy Promised Land.

What if I’m stuck like this forever?

I have two choices staring me in the face right now. One is easy and one is terrifying.

I could just move out in February like I planned – right down the street from where I work. And that’s it.

Or I could move to NYC. Completely start over. And be anything I want to be.

What if I can’t make a choice?

What if I make the wrong one?

One Direction

Ok guys, lets talk about One Direction.

Well, I guess this isn’t really talking… More like me writing and you reading. But I feel like we are connected… Sort of… Now I’m creeping myself out.

I like One Direction.


I REALLY like One Direction.

And it’s kind of weird. Because I’ll be honest… Up until about 2 months ago, I could have cared less about them. I knew next to nothing about them. Except that the one, with the hair, dated Taylor Swift. I couldn’t name all of them. I knew they were European and highly attractive. I knew they sang “That’s What Makes You Beautiful” (ironically I don’t like this song – I know, I know, I’m the worst fan ever).


Honestly, it’s just unfair that there are 5 guys that are that attractive, and talented, and lovely people.

I don’t know how it happened. I had listened to “Best Song Ever” when it came out, and I didn’t think much of it. But then somehow at the end of August/beginning of September something happened. And I just went nuts. I decided to watch EVERY SINGLE video on their YouTube and Vevo channels. I don’t know why. I just did. And I fell hopelessly in love with One Direction. It’s a slippery slope man… I’ll never be the same. I know too much. I follow them all on Twitter. I follow their updates and change the time zones on my iPhone so I know what time it is where they are. I watch old concerts and interviews of them. I know their freaking birthdays now.


So perfect…

It’s becoming a problem. I’m 24 years old for goodness sake… Who am I kidding. My only regret is that it took me this long to really fall in love with them. They are lovely. Pretty much the rest of this post is gonna be pictures of these gorgeous, wonderful, talented, kind, generous, attractive, hott, lovely boys.


Niall Horan. Irish. 20 years old. The most attractive person on this earth. Best laugh I’ve ever heard.


I’m not supposed to have a favorite. But if I did… Niall would be it. I love him. He is perfect. I would willingly have his children – and we all know how I don’t want kids. So that’s saying a lot.


Look at him, all perfect in his sunglasses.


I just can’t…


Harry Styles. British. 19 years old. Apparently is unable to ever actually button his shirt all the way.


Ridiculously attractive. I can see why Taylor fell for him. But I will always side with my Taylor. I want to touch his hair.


Seriously though, there are buttons on the shirt for a reason man.


Louis Tomlinson. British. 21 years old. Notorious prankster. I don’t know how someone can be so handsome yet so immature at the same time.


He has such great hair. And he’s great at soccer. And his girlfriend is gorgeous.


Adorable, just adorable.


Liam Payne. British. 20 years old. Clearly the fittest member of 1D. His biceps… I just… Gosh.


He also responds the most to fans on Twitter. Which I really appreciate. He goes out of his way to talk to the fans.


The scruff… He is so incredibly sweet and kind. He’d just be the best friend.


Zayne Malik. British. 20 years old. The most attractive person of all time ever. Look at him. JUST LOOK AT HIM.


He’s prettier than most girls. Those cheekbones, his perfect nose, the eyes… Models wish they could look like him.


He is the quietest and most private member of the band but he is fiercely protective of the 1D fans. He always stands up for them… us… It’s us now. I’m one of them.

Well there ya go. It’s all out there now. I love One Direction. I’m not ashamed. Now to devise a plan of how to meet them and convince at least one of them to date me/marry me/be my best friend…


Bronchitis In Amish Country

As many of you know, I have been sick. I went to see my doctor on Thursday morning and I found out that it wasn’t allergies, or a cold, or even a sinus infection. I have bronchitis.

When I get sick. I get whiny. When I get really sick… I get so whiny that people want to punch me in the face (just ask my best friend, I’m really surprised she hasn’t killed me yet).

Now I had Friday-Sunday off. I should have been able to relax, heal, sleep, feel better, overdose on NyQuil. But no. I had plans.

I went to Amish Country. Lancaster, PA to be exact. With my mother. There was no relaxing. None. Nada. Zilch.


This would be a good time to point out that I am actually scared of Amish people. I don’t know why. I just am.

Now every year my parents go to Lancaster for their anniversary. Unfortunately, my Dad’s sub at work quit so he has to work 6 days a week and can’t take any days off. Therefore he could not go on this trip. So I got to go on my parents’ anniversary trip with my mother. It’s times like this where I swear my life could be a terrible sitcom. Just terrible.

Mom’s not so good on the driving – so I drove. Mom loves antiquing – we did a lot of antique shopping. Mom loves soft pretzels – well so do I so there wasn’t a problem there. Mom loves primitive crafts – we stopped at 5 stores (on top of the 6 antique places we went to… in just one day). Mom has bad arthritis – I had to carry every single multiple purchase. Mom loves Celine Dion – we listened to a lot of Celine Dion. Mom loves Amish people – we had to wake up at 7am on a Friday to go on an Amish bus tour with elderly people and this random family from Brooklyn with small child that sucked on his seat and licked the window.

Lets not forget though, that I have bronchitis. Lots of coughing, lots of nose blowing, lots of meds, lots of headaches… etc…

My  mother and I don’t always get along. Because we are REALLY similar (which is surprising, since I’ve tried my whole life not to be like my parents). We can fight. And pick on each other. My mother also forgets that I have very modern tastes. So antiquing… Looking at old stuff that people have for sale, that’s dirty, and you don’t know who owned it… Kind of grosses me out.

And why do you have to be quiet in antique shops? When did that become a rule? Just because it’s mostly old ladies and quiet women does not mean that I HAVE TO BE QUIET! I am loud. So I cough loud. And I clear my throat loud. And if I’m made to be antique shopping by my mother, GOSH DARN IT, I will be loud! So don’t look at me funny, or sigh, or glare, or stare, or what not. You old ladies can stuff it! I will be loud in antique shops! Or you can just throw me out!

And why do Amish people ask for tips so much? Yes I know, everything you bake/cook is delicious, and due to your weird belief system you have weird/odd jobs. But if I buy your dang soft pretzel, don’t stare at your tip jar. I’m not gonna put anything in it. If I bought a soft pretzel from a vendor at a baseball game I wouldn’t tip him. You and your soft pretzel making talents are not special to me. I will eat almost any soft pretzel. How dare you try to make me feel guilty about NOT tipping you.

Why do antique shops always have a plethora of horrifyingly creepy dolls that are ALWAYS missing some sort of body part or all of their clothing? Who is going to buy that? What kind of sick freak goes to each antique shop looking for that type of doll? They should be arrested.

Why do all Amish children wave at you when you drive past? I felt like I was in a freakin parade. Stop it. I don’t like strangers and you and your black monotone colored clothes made me sad and uncomfortable and you make me think a lot about how I would live without an iPhone. I don’t like those thoughts. I love my iPhone.

Why do Amish children never wear shoes? Do they have shoes? Don’t their feet get dirty? What if you stepped on a bee!!!!???

Fun times.

I ate a lot of soft pretzels.